I have been away, for a long time.
The past year has been one of many challenges. And there has been "a challenge, within the challenges," in discovering ways to practically and authentically apply what I have learned about being an HSP, during the past decade and change.
It has weighed on me that I have felt neglectful, with respect to updating these pages.
At the same time, I have been mindful of what it truly means to "honor" my needs, as an HSP.
As HSPs, we often have an extreme sense of duty and responsibility. Many HSPs could be characterized as "loyal to a fault." Loyalty and steadfastness are admirable traits... but the "fault" part can become a problem, when we allow ourselves (to our detriment) to become trapped by our sense of duty and obligation.
Whereas "being of service to others" can be a very important part of life (and remains an important part of mine), sometimes I have to pause and remind myself that I am no good to anyone else if I drive myself into the ground while carrying out such "service."
The ability to assess a situation and prioritize is of utmost importance to HSPs. Of course, it's of importance to everyone, but HSPs-- with our more easily overwhelmed natures-- must be particularly mindful of our choices and priorities. We must ask ourselves "Does this act, habit, idea, person best serve our needs, in this moment?"
I'm not advocating that we should just throw away anything that's not working "right now," just that we "pause and prioritize," on a regular basis. Nor am I advocating some kind of selfishness-- just stopping and evaluating.
What's most important?
What has become not as important, that once was important?
What can be discarded, completely?
Should something new be started?
Since September of last year, I have faced all these questions, many times.
My 87-year old mother was suffering from dementia, and had to move into an assisted living facility. She lived in Europe, I live in Washington state, in the US. I was her only living relative. At the beginning of August this year, she passed away. My priorities for the past year changed.
An old relationship ended, and was "redefined."
A business I had been "playing" with became a full-time occupation-- a "calling" of sorts-- allowing me to weather this economic climate, as a self-employed person.
A new-- much healthier, and reciprocal-- relationship grew, and blossomed.
The above all led me to "choice points" where my lessons learned about being an HSP taught me that if I were to add something new to my plate, I also needed to take something off my plate. Among the things that came off my plate was most of my active involvement in the online HSP community. It was all about establishing priorities, within the framework of knowing that-- as an HSP-- I am able to manage a finite number of tasks and no more, if I am to remain emotionally healthy.
Talk Back: How often to YOU "take inventory" of the state of your life? How good are you at managing your energy, and finding balance? How good are you at removing "what's no longer needed" to make room for new opportunities? Leave a comment!
A Blog written by a Highly Sensitive Person. Thoughts and ramblings on life as a Highly Sensitive Person in an often not so sensitive world.
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
Update from Management
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Hey, I had thought you were no longer writing here! Nice to see something sort of recent. The balance I have been seeking regards communication. Finding ways to relate to others and happening onto those gems of conversation. Standing alone in a crowd just watching and waiting, trying not to panic and then, gently... it happens. But it does take finding a balance and tolerating the feeling that you are so obviously standing by yourself, an apparent outcast, which of course isn't true.ReplyDelete