HSP On The Road: Joshua Tree

I am not home, at the moment. I am typing these words from the funky living room of a small bungalow in Joshua Tree, California. It has been a while since I last traveled-- almost precisely two years.

This morning, I was having conversations with myself-- inside my head-- as to whether or not I have really missed the change of scenery.

Let me preface this by saying that I experience travel and adventures through the eyes of a LOW "sensation seeker" HSP. I am one of those who prefers routines and "the known" to adventures and the unknown. And I have never really felt compelled to "collect experiences," for their own sake.

Traveling is overwhelming. You go to a place you don't know, and you don't have your "stuff" and you're probably on a different schedule than you're used to. Things around you are unfamiliar, and (depending on where you are) maybe even the food is unfamiliar. These are all things that don't sit so well with many of us HSPs

What I do really like about traveling is that it offers me the chance to get away from the ever-present piles of "things I need to get done," and the attendant sense of stress and pressure that comes with knowing that no matter how hard I might try, there will always be more "things" in need of doing than there is "me."

As I sit here and look out across the back patio onto a yard filled with unfamiliar vegetation and wildlife, I feel a certain degree of relaxation come over me... from settling into the realization that there is not a thing I can do about all the stuff clamoring for my attention, back at home. I might as well just relax.

Of course, it has taken me some years to learn to "stop worrying" while I am away.

A tendency to "worry" seems to go hand-in-hand with being a Highly Sensitive Person. Maybe it's that sense of "conscientiousness" Elaine Aron talks about, in her books. I worry, because I feel like I am not being conscientious enough about my work, when I am away from that work. At least I used to. And I used to feel like I was "failing" people by "daring" to take time off. The irony of that is that I never thought anything negative about other people for taking time off...

I expect these feelings have been exacerbated by the fact that I am self-employed in a "company of one." The infamous "buck" stops with me.

Taking time off does give me the opportunity to engage in one of my favorite pastimes: "sitting and thinking." And while engaged in sitting and thinking, I often feel my mind and body let go of all the tension and stress that has built up, as a result of normal daily life.

HSPs are often uncomfortable with the unfamiliar... so we tend to avoid it. I know I often have. There may be all sorts of truisms about "stretching your boundaries" and "stepping out of your comfort zone," but to what end do we do so? And is it really helpful... or is the very fact that we have-- and get to be in-- a comfort zone part of what makes us able to feel centered, as HSPs?

What do YOU think? First of all, do you enjoy travel, and the change of scenery? Or does it just stress you out? Do you find "unfamiliar territory" to be a good thing, or a bad thing? On a broader level than just travel, do you think that "pushing outside your comfort zone" is important for HSPs? Or do you feel more like the very fact that you have a comfort zone and stick to it, is what keeps you grounded? Do share and leave a comment!

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HSPs, Travel & Preparing for the Unknown

The late John Lennon once said "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans."

A couple of years ago, Sarah and I spent a week in Taos, NM, attending the annual Labyrinth Society Gathering. I won't get into details about the event itself-- although Labyrinths are highly relevant to HSPs, in my opinion-- but the whole business of "going" got me to thinking about the issue of HSPs and travel.

In the course of my 15-odd years of being part of the global HSP "community," I have heard many highly sensitive people lament that travel is either very difficult for them, or they avoid it altogether, too concerned about dealing with the unfamiliarity of strange places, the discomfort of hotel beds and the general overstimulation that goes with planning and going on a trip.

It always surprises me a bit that there have not been dedicated books and web sites, specifically written about this topic. For a while, there was an "HSP Travel" blog on the web, but it ceased publication a few years back. A couple of HSP writers published short booklets about travel and "HSP-friendly" venues in their cities. Aside from that, nothing.

After the snow; Denver Airport, 10/26/2011

But I digress. There are a few simple things you can do, as an HSP, to make the traveling experience less taxing and more enjoyable.

One of the items on Dr. Elaine Aron's self-assessment for sensitivity reads: "Changes in my life shake me up." Another reads: "I make it a high priority to arrange my life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations."

Now, think about these two in the context of being an HSP and dealing with modern travel-- being in a strange location, dealing with flight delays and cancellations, and so forth.

Of course, you can't prepare for everything. Like flight delays caused by weather. Case in point: We thought that flying to Albuquerque via Denver would be a safe bet, in October. Alas, no! 

On our return flight, we ended up with major delays, due to an unexpected blizzard... causing us to miss one flight and have to wait five hours to connect with the next one.

Ultimately it was a good reminder that some things are just beyond our control... and then the best thing we can do is just settle in and relax; pacing endlessly or getting overwrought with worry will not make any difference. 

As an HSP, the best thing you can do is find a part of the terminal that has fewer people and settle in with a good book or-- if you're traveling with your laptop computer-- use the airport's free wifi network to catch up on some correspondence, write in your journal, or even play puzzle games or whatever else you might do online during slack times.

Remember, there are certain things you simply can't change (like flight schedules and the weather); focus on the ones you can!

Safe travels!